The Fantasy Fan, March, 1934 Read online

  If you go in person, buy a plot in a local cemetery.

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  A SAD STORY OF THE FUTURE

  by Forrest J. Ackerman

  (Following is a brief summary of a recent radio broadcast taken fromthe story “We Buy Us a Robot—and What Happened” in the American Weekly.)

  A married couple had an eight year old robot, and decided that it wasabout time to get a new one as ‘Willy’ was becoming worn and creaky andinefficient; so, they went to look over the newest models. Theyselected Julius, a most capable iron-man who could not tell a lie. Thisproved a disadvantage, however, as, upon entering their home hedeclared in his deep, hollow, mechanical voice: “Dust—much dust!”

  As the wife would grow lonely when her husband was away, she had aphonograph record made of him assuring her how much he loved her. Thisshe inserted into Julius, and listened to him. But this made Juliusbecome very pensive and sad. One day he was found reading love poemsand crying. Julius was in love! He realized the hopelessness of thesituation.

  One day he was found missing. “Oh! He’s committed suicide!” the wifecried, “I know it!”

  “But that’s impossible!” her husband assured her, “if he tries to drownhimself, he will only be short-circuited and rusted, and could berevitalized and polished up just like new. If he shoots himself, but afew parts need be replaced. Jumping from a window would merely dent hima little. He cannot hang himself; he cannot poison himself; he cannotdie by fire. Anyhow, our contract guarantees us against loss bysuicide.”

  Just then the televisor flashed on. It was an upstairs neighbor.

  “My son’s all dirty and greasy,” he bellowed, “and it’s your fault!”

  “Our fault? How so?” they asked.

  He gave a serial number. “That’s your robot, isn’t it? Well, he wentout into the park and called a lot of kids around him; told them hewasn’t feeling well; gave them screw-drivers and asked to find out whatwas the matter with him. In a few minutes he was scattered all over sixblocks.”

  Julius, the mechanical man, had taken the only method an automaton knewof committing suicide.——

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  THE TIME MACHINE

  (A Bibliographical Note)

  by R. H. Barlow

  The first publication of the tale that later became Wells’ most famousshort novel, was in a paper issued at his school. The magazine, TheScience Schools Quarterly, serialized a story of the same underlyingplot, dealing with a Welsh professor. This was, broadly speaking, thedebut of the story. It was later re-written, and some decadeafterwards, after being published in both the National Observer and TheNew Review, appeared in a modest little volume published by Wm.Heinomann. Preceding it were two text-books and Conversations With AnUncle came out the day immediately before.

  The book in its first English edition, was a modest duodecimo volumemeasuring approximately 7 X 5 X 1 ins. It was bound in a coarselinen-like grey cloth, and bore in purple lettering as well as thetitle a peculiar device of a rather emaciated sphinx. It containedpages 152 and XVI. The text, besides the title page was virtually thesame as that recently issued in Short Stories of H. G. Wells, butdiffered in several respects from that Amazing Stories used in theirMay, 1927 issue.

  It appeared simultaneously both in the bound edition and wrappers, theformer at the price of 3s, and the latter at 2s 6d.

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  Fantasy Magazine the DIGEST of IMAGINATIVE LITERATURE]

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  In the April issue of _Fantasy_:

  THE DEAD WOMAN

  _by David H. Keller, M. D._

  The beloved Dr. Keller has produced, in this story, one of the greatestweird-psychological stories he has ever written. The unusual,horrifying, tale of the terrible thing conceived in the mind of ahusband, written as _only Dr. Keller can write_.

  “The Last Poet and the Robots” A. Merritt’s beautiful chapter of the Super-Novel, COSMOS

  An Interview with Leo Morey

  “Science Friction” a poem by J. Harvey Haggard

  Another installment of the interesting “Scientific Hoaxes”

  Alicia, the sweet sophisticated young lady whose misadventures in Blunderland have been amusing FM readers, says farewell.

  The four news columns:

  The Science Fiction Eye The Ether Vibrates Spilling the Atoms Scientifilm Snapshots

  keep you well informed on coming events in the fantasy field and otherfeatures

  In future issues

  Poetry, stories, and articles by

  H. P. Lovecraft Clark Ashton Smith Donald Wandrei Edmond Hamilton David H. Keller, M. D. P. Schuyler Miller L. A. Eshbach Fletcher Pratt and many others

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  Rates: one cent per word

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  CLARK ASHTON SMITH presents THE DOUBLE SHADOW AND OTHER FANTASIES—abooklet containing a half-dozen imaginative and atmospherictales—stories of exotic beauty, glamor, terror, strangeness, irony andsatire. Price: 25 cents each (coin or stamps). Also a small remainderof EBONY AND CRYSTAL—a book of prose-poems published at $2.00, reducedto $1.00 per copy. Everything sent postpaid. Clark Ashton Smith,Auburn, California.

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  Back Numbers of _The Fantasy Fan_: September, 20 cents (only a fewleft); October, November, December, January, February, 10 cents each.

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  WEIRD TALES, dated 1923, 1924, 1925, and some later issues are wanted.If you have any old numbers that you are willing to part with, pleasecommunicate with the Editor.

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  TRANSCRIBER’S NOTE

  Punctuation has been normalized.

  Variations in hyphenation were maintained.

  Portions of articles that were separated from the main in the layout ofthe periodical have been rejoined.

  The following typographical or printers’ errors have been corrected:

  _As printed_: _Changed to_:

  accout account ane and Annes Anne’s arttcle article bo by cemetary cemetery collecton collection contaics contains crme came crystaline crystalline dan day dece
ased diseased extiuguished extinguished floatee floated geip grip ha he I It immersurable immeasurable incidently incidentally interestiug interesting Literaature Literature mens men National Observor National Observer racilly racially ratonalism rationalism re-wrttten re-written sang sank Sayer Sayers searate separate she she had sneathed sheathed stupify stupefy that than Vallahalla Vallhalla villian villain weild wield Welesh Welsh whidh which wouldd’t wouldn’t

  Italicized words and phrases are presented by surrounding the text with_underscores_.